I’m really on the loose this week.  I’m in NYC with my son looking at colleges.  He’s 19 and ready to leave the confines of sunny LA (if you can believe that I’m talking about Hollywood like it’s a small town in Ohio) and move to Metropolis.
I lived in New York for a long time before moving west.  It’s nice to see it again through fresh eyes. His eyes.  The constant motion, the electricity and the all consuming energy. He can barely contain himself and it’s not just the novelty of the place.  He’s at the point in life where it’s all one great big possibility waiting to be realized, and I must say I’m jealous.  Not because I feel my possibilities have come and gone.  Believe me, that’s hardly the case.  I’ve got a lot of schemes left in me and I intend to use them all.  It’s much more about the excitement he feels being at this place in life.  He wants to study filmmaking, directing in particular.  He knows with certainty he wants to be here and nowhere else. He knows with certainty he wants to make movies and he knows  with certainty he’s going to make a mark on the world.
So, I thought, why can’t I feel that again?  That certainty, that artist’s “all in” mentality.  Then I realized, there’s no reason why I can’t.  I control my own feelings, right?  I can choose to feel that sense of endless possibility again. I can choose to push aside that voice of experience that says: we’ll see what happens. I can choose to wake each day with a fire in my belly ready to attack my ideas and see them come to life.  I mean really, where did it go? It’s still there, I just think the fire recedes over the years and is overtaken by concentration as you master the skill set of your craft.  It’s not that it isn’t there, it’s just a little covered over by the brine of a career.
So here’s my challenge: get excited about the possibilities ahead again.  Yes, that’s it.  The sum total of my lesson.  I can’t do it for you. Nor can I get you to change your thinking.  What I can tell you is that I’ve decided to do it for myself.  Just making that decision has me excited and motivated to try new things and push forward.  There are new deals and lots of financial possibility in this decision.  I’m thinking I’m going to need them, because I’m about to have a big fat tuition to pay.

7 responses to “Possibility

  1. gabriel zenone

    This needs to be inside a billion kindles.

  2. If you think you’re going to need them (new deals and financial posibility), it might be a huge weight on your shoulders that might cut your enthusiasm. 😉
    Here’s another perspective: You don’t need anything! You might want to …. (fill in the blanks)…. because this idea of … (fill in the blanks) … is really exciting for you, That will be a huge motivator! Find the excitment in the idea, not in the need. The need will be taken care of … in the procss of realizing that great idea!
    BTW: “I’m about to have a big fat tuition to pay.” – is it only you who have to pay? Why don’t you involve your son in this? After all it’s his future and he might get a great experience by getting involve in realizing it (from financial point of view too) – and he will appreciate the results even more!

  3. Couldn’t have said it better myself, we may have hit the mastery stage in our lives but we still have 30-40 more years to discover things, let’s bring up the joy and fire!

  4. Gabriela,
    You open an interesting discussion. You see, though what I do myself is not art directly, I love it and it does excite and motivate me. Even though what I do is make money for people and in turn myself, I view it as a craft and an artform. There’s no reason why artists can’t feel the same way about business. We’re creating everything in our lives, even money. My responsibilities are not a weight, they are a blessing and dare I say joy. My ideas work in concert with my life and my business. I just want to recapture that “youthful” enthusiasm my son has that undoubtedly comes from energy, the pursuit of craft and a certain amount of naivete.

    I can feel it rubbing off on me this week. It’s contagious! I want to hold onto it and have it rub off on some other folks. Wouldn’t that make the world just a little bit better?

    • Steve,

      The fact that you resonate with your son’s “youthful” enthusiasm tells me that you felt that it was missing in your self. I guess you can regain it with a little twist on what you’re doing now. Take it a notch up – what can you do (a little) different in what you do now to bring it back? What new idea excites you and wants to be implemented? We cannot rely only on others’ enthusiasm, we should look to regain it ourselves.
      From this “certain amount of naivete” many great things were born and humanity should thank to those that had the courage and confidence to pursue their dreams, despite of the fact that others called it “naivete” at the beginning.

  5. Had that feeling just a year ago when I was touring colleges too, it’s awesome to say the least! Good luck, he’s going to love college, a lot of fun and a lot of opportunity.

  6. gabriel zenone

    Gee gosh. I am flawed. What with this gigantic head full of grey matter floating in a vat of testosterone and this floppity penis that makes it so hard for me to think clearly. Thank goodness there are women who can deconstruct intelligent positive offerings and place themselves in the position of being the “Keeper of clarity”. Oy vey lady.

    First of all…it’s dualistic to consider desire or ‘need’ as suffering. This constant granola approach to the eradication of all need, desire and future projection as earthbound delusions is just a pain avoidance tactic that people who are in pain suck up from books. Anyone who has seriously studied knows it ain’t possible. Even Monks desire the lunch bell to ring.

    There is no avoidance of suffering so suck it up and go ahead and want stuff. It’s as valuable as sitting in a monastery contemplating your navel.

    Piercing the veil of expressed faults in thinking…is an expressed fault in thinking. It’s what’s known as meta-criticism. It’s me criticizing you criticizing Agent criti – goes on forever. It’s flawed thinking. But…I’m cool with that because I’m a knucklehead who wants things.

    The desire to have no desire is still…desire.

    I leave you with a koan:
    “If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him.”

    I’d sign this Namaste – but I’m from Brooklyn.
    Damn. Comment sections can sour a sunny day.

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